New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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