3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
birth control should be required to get into college
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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