New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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