Porn is love you can see.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
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so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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