oh god the rape fog is back!
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
do nipples grow back?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
