Just cropdusted the office
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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