i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
A+ Viking dick
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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