Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize