shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
