I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
