omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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