Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
