I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
