Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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