my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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