Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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