Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You pole danced in your parka.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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