is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
