Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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