dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
