I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
