I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
