Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
