Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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