forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
