Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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