She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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