They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
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Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
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do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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