Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
