so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I was not drunk enough for that final.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize