We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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