Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You smell like stripper and shame
apparently the secret to your success is patron
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
