Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize