I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
