We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick has a subreddit
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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