Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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