how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i wish my penis had a tongue
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Your penis caused this!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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