The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
