Don't you send me to vm
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
