We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
