I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
