i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
