He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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