Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
