You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize