You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
