glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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