everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize