Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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