she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize