singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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