you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
